Gratitude now!

Serenity now! Serenity now! But I feel more like gratitude now, gratitude now! Why? Because I feel ungrateful lately, evident in the way I whined about my quesadilla falling apart when I was trying to eat it, at least I have a quesidilla to eat. Have you noticed I don't know how to spell quesedilla? Yeah well I'm an English major not a Spanish major. Anyhow, things I'm grateful for: 1: A good and loving God 2: My good looking, good cooking husband 3: the opportunity to go to school (got to keep repeating that one to myself) 4: a car that runs like a kitten purr, or however the saying goes 5: the opportunity to be humbled, not that I am wishing for that fyi I'm just grateful for the growth it brings 6: the mountains and going for hikes with the man 7: making my shirt into a bag to carry pine cones home in, we call that ingenuity 8: fresh veggies from my uncles garden 9: healthy ways to keep my pits from stinking to high heaven (I don't trust deordorant, it's poison) 10: and again my ever patient and loving husband. I could go on but I have a paper to write. (Serenity now!)

God's Grace

No one knows how to make God sound like a rock star more than Joel Osteen. Occasionally, I find myself enjoying his programming and listening to him proclaim things like "Our God is far out!" Through time and strife, I have come to appreciate Joel and his insight. Especially when he says things like "You are heavy laden,not with burdens. Not with troubles, but with God's grace. You are heavy laden with God's favor.You only have to give God permission to flood you with blessings." This statement reminded me of another unexpected source of insight, Creflo Dollar. Weird right. But I once heard him say to his congregation "God's grace is already there. Forgiveness is done. All it is for you to do is to take ownership of what God has already done." This I know, God is limitless. The atonement is already done, which means healing is done, forgiveness is done, love is already there and available. By not accepting the blessings, love and healing that is already made for us, we are limiting God. By not owning the things provided us, we are denying the love God gave us through His son. I find myself doing this very thing in many areas of my life. In the words of Joel Osteen "You walk in God's grace. You are showered with His favor. Why do you deny Him the great pleasure of blessing you with greatness?"

Bread Brain

For almost a whole month, my work has been on hiatus. This has made me very very bored. After a few out of boredom melt downs, I made bread. And have been making bread. Lots of bread. Sometimes the man even makes bread. We have gone from eating no bread at all to 2 loaves a week. What a joy. My mouth is watering just waiting for the fresh loaves to get out in about 2 minutes. But really, is there anything better than fresh baked bread smothered in home made jam? Oh that's right, we made jam too. Just call me Laura Ingles.

I have something to say about that...

Lately, and when I say lately I mean like the last few years, I have been trying to decide how I feel about homosexuality and especially when it comes to marriage. I have done a lot of reading, thinking, and praying about the subject. I have change my mind about it several times. And then I decided to let my heart decide. My head has said over and over, "No big deal, they aren't hurting anyone, Live and Let Live." This has been my thinking but it never felt right to me. My heart was never at peace. My heart tells me that there is something more to marriage than just happiness. My heart also tells me that a persons gender means something. And that both genders have a place in a marriage and in a family. And that children that are brought into that family have a right to grow in the strength of both feminine and masculine love. This does not mean that I believe persons in same sex relationships should be treated badly. And as far as legal unions between these, I am still unsure of where I stand. My post today is regarding the way I feel those who do believe same sex marriage is ok treat those of us who don't. To me, the hypocrisy seems to be as clear as day but maybe it isn't for others. A big argument I see on the interslice is an attitude that those who support homosexuality are bullied and badgered by those of us who don't. And that may be true, in fact, I'm sure it is. On the other hand, I see private organizations and businesses and even myself being demonized for standing up for what they believe, and I see that the bullying is on both sides. What I see and feel is that people of differing beliefs are asking each other to be small. In fact I have read and seen on both sides that those who disagree should "be ashamed of themselves." I have been told this myself, that I should be ashamed of something I posted on Pinterest. It would seem that now the side opposite of what I believe is saying, we're done being small, this is who we are, see us. But they seem to be doing so by trying to make me small. Trying to make me feel ashamed and small because of my beliefs, that I have spent time and love and it has been difficult to come to these beliefs. Basically what I am saying is, if you have something to prove, than prove it. But as we have all been taught since youth, You don't make yourself bigger by making others small.

Girls and Boys

Ok so here are a few things on my mind since I have been MIA. I'm slowly coming out of the newly wed bliss state. But I don't expect a full recovery for a long while. Number one thing on my mind, I can't seem to remember to do anything but watch Awkward. and play on Pinterest. Every other day I'm like oh here is a list of things to do and then I completely forget about it for a few days. Oh well, none if it is that important anyway, right? I mean who needs to make sure things at the bank are in order or make sure moneys owed to people get paid. Silly stuff. Second, I feel really annoyed that girls (and boys for that matter) are so darn trashy these days. I just don't understand why teenagers are all so needy and trashy and why I find it to be as funny as it is annoying and detestable. Thirdly, I would like to post wedding pictures and let you all gawk at how lovely I look, but it doesn't seem to be working. Darn.

He is not here; He is Risen

This last week I was surrounded and reminded of a time not long ago when I was literally surround by hate. The man I was in a relationship was abusive in every way possible. There were nights that I was physically and emotion abused for hours at a time and I had never felt more alone and more surrounded by the love of my Redeemer. How could he do this to me when I had loved him so much? At a time when I wished he would die, the Savior saved me from my own hate. It was a painful and emotional journey to my Lord but He had come and I was not alone. I can't say that I believe the LDS church is true but I can and I will shout it to the world that I know my Redeemer lives. I know that He walked alone so I would not have to do so. I know that He loves me, I know that He died for my sins. And I know that He rose from the grave that I would not have to know the pain of death or the pain of separation from my Heavenly Father. Jesus the Christ died for my sins and my hate that I may be redeemed and saved and brought to the true love of Christ.

Happy Easter to us all! He is not here, He is Risen!

Here Comes the Bride!!

Aaaaahhhh!!! My wedding dress is here! And it is wonderful, a little long but beautiful. I love it. I can't believe that I am getting married. Weird. Wonderfully weird.