Death Comes in a Pretty Shade of Red

This post may fall into the TMI category for some, so proceed with caution. Lately my body has been suffering from some ailments. This certain ailment is usually helped with the application of cranberry juice to one's diet. Not the sugary fruit cocktail cranberry juice, just straight cranberry juice. I finally remembered to get some cranberry juice. I hate cranberry juice. Why? Look at it. It's such a pretty color, it's that perfect color of dark red that you wish you could pull off wearing on your lips. It's looks like Paris in the spring time. It reminds you of that episode of I love Lucy when she is stomping on the grapes and it's so funny. The color of cranberry juice holds all the romantic daydreams you've ever had, it even smells so sweet and delicious. You pour yourself a glass, expecting it to be a sweet kiss of summer. A cool refreshing treat. It slips right on to your tongue and your eyes bulge out of your head. Your mouth twists and turns into a bitter revolt. It's sour bitterness burns your throat going down. And you're left in utter shock and disappointment. You feel slightly put out, as if the cranberry juice broke a promise and dashed all of your childhood dreams. You recover and think what just happened. You step away to gather yourself, come back a few minutes later, and are tricked again by that delicious beautiful color of red. You take another swig. And again you're left utterly disappointed. Cranberry juice is the ultimate "punker". It punks you time and time again and you fall for it every time.
Maybe that's just me though cause I REALLY hate sour. Which is why I have been having a staring contest with the glass of cranberry juice in front of me for like an hour. Anyway I hate my bladder and UTI's and cranberry juice.